Posts tagged ‘sansa’

Episode 2: “The Kingsroad” – Review/Synopsis

Note: I have not read the books, blah blah blah.  And yes, it appears I like the show enough to do another review. 😛

It’s time to go over what happened in the last episode of Game of Thrones.  Are you excited?  I’m excited!  WE SO EXCITED.

Sorry.

Episode 2: “The Kingsroad”

Before I really get into the review, can I just say how much I love the opening credits?  So epic.

Anyways, the episode opens up with Daenerys riding with the Dothraki towards some destination, though I’m honestly not sure where they are heading.  I imagine back to their homeland.  Daenerys looks despondent and unhappy with her current situation (and I don’t blame her, rape and arranged marriage isn’t my cup of tea either).  Ser Jorah attempts to rouse her spirits but seems to fail miserably.

Maybe if Daenerys was a lesbian in High School, Jorah's "It gets better" speech would have worked... better.

Jorah attempts to plead her case subtly to Viserys to go back to the comfort of the Magister’s place, but Vicerys isn’t going anywhere ’till he gets his damn army.

We switch scenes back to Winterfell, where Tyrion wakes up with some more interesting bedmates.

Oh, Tyrion.

Joffrey (aka creepy prince kid) is conveniently there when he wakes, and with the only comment I found amusing from him the entire episode.  “Better looking bitches than you are used to, Uncle.”  Joffrey proceeds to get snotty and irritable by refusing to give his sympathies to Bran’s family. Tyrion then slaps him in the face, which was probably my single favorite moment in the entire episode.  Can someone turn that into a .gif for me?  Seriously.  Joffrey threatens to run to mommy, and Tyrion hits him again.  SCORE!

AND THEN HE HITS HIM AGAIN, after Joffrey refuses.

I love this little man.  The Hound reminds Tyrion that the young prince will remember that to which Tyrion responds, “I hope so!”

It’s time for BREAKFAST AT THE LANNISTERS, and I swear if I have to look at Cersei’s smirking face one more time I’m going to vomit.  It’s unforunate, because I have a feeling she is going to be around for awhile.

Anyways, in contrast to Joffrey, his brother and sister seem to be polar opposites and give me hope for the Lannister family beyond Tyrion.  They are simply adorable little creatures, and seem fairly good natured.  Tyrion informs Cersei that Bran may live at which she seems a little disturbed by.  Serves the bitch right.  Jaime tries to make a case for Bran having a quick death rather than be a cripple, but Tyrion says, “Death is so final.  Whereas, life… life is full of possibilities.”

Also, he’s interested to what Bran has to say when he wakes.  (I think we all are.)

Well, they aren't.

Cersei comes to visit Bran and Catelyn (how kind) and proceeds to tell what is supposed to be a heartwarming story about how her first son died from a fever. Oh… okay.

I have a hard time sympathizing.

Scene switch, and Jaime has a talk with Jon Snow and pretty much makes fun of his choice to join the Night Watch while Jon just looks confused.  It seems he may be having second thoughts about his decision.  Perhaps.

Jon goes to see Arya (SHE SPEAKS!).  He gives Arya a sword at which she is ecstatic to receive, since he obviously knows her better than to give her a cross-stitch kit or something.(“Sansa can keep her sewing needles.  I’ve got a needle of my own.”)  He then says goodbye, but methinks Arya needs to work on hers a bit.

I'll miss you too. WITH MY SWORDD.

Jon has another touching goodbye scene with Bran (who is still comatose), and tells Bran where he is going and tell that he will be able to visit when he is better.  Catelyn seems really pissed at Jon’s presence in the room and tells him to GTFO as Ned walks in.

Ned tries to reassure his wife and tell her that everything will be okay, but she has a hard time believing him.  I don’t blame her – last time he left, he came back with another woman’s kid.  Although, holding it against Jon is a bit petty…

Robb and Jon hug it out with a tinge of bromance.

It's GUUUUY love! Though seriously, I wouldn't be surprised considering all the incest we've seen in the first episode alone.

Jon seems to get along well with his entire family except for Catelyn.  Oh well, can’t win them all.

Jon and company take off, followed by Ned, the girls, and the Lannisters. (However, I never understood exactly why Arya came along. Sansa, I get.  Not Arya.)  Ned promises to tell Jon about his mother the next time they meet, and Jon departs the opposite way of the fork in the road towards the Wall.

Get it?  Because it’s a FORK.  Like, TWO PATHS IN LIFE.  AND JON WENT A DIFFERENT PATH.  IT’S A FORK.

Er, sorry.
Ned and Robert reminise about the olden days, before getting down TO BUSINESS.  A WAR IS COMING.  So is winter.  There seems to be a lot of things coming.

Scene switch, and Daenerys is getting fucked by Drogo again, though she doesn’t seem to be enjoying it much.  She gets distracted by the pretty dragon eggs.  Whatever it takes, I guess.
Meanwhile, back on the journey to the Wall, Jon is unhappy with his fellow companions.  Tyrion and Jon talk again, and honestly… I love their conversations.  They have a great dynamic.

Back in Winterfell, Catelyn seems ill-equipped to deal with everything including the accounts, and appointments, etc.  I guess it’s cause she’s a woman.  Or upset.  Robb saves the day and agrees to make the appointments.  Robb points out that she should leave the room once in a while before dashing off to put out a fire.  Conveniently, an assasin shows up to kill Bran, but Bran’s wolf rips out his throat.  Good dog!

It's just a flesh wound.

After this, Catelyn is pretty sure that someone is trying to kill her son.  Hmm, you think?  The dagger in question is pretty expensive looking blade, thus deducing that the man was hired.

Hmm, you think?  Because, you know… assassins aren’t HIRED TO KILL FOR PEOPLE WHO DONT WANT TO GET THEIR HANDS DIRTY or anything.  I mean, that’s kinda their job.  Just saying.  Catelyn decides to ride up to King’s Landing to inform Ned, although one of the old guys from the super secret family meeting points out that it’s dangerous to travel alone, so he offers to go with her.  Because an old man and a rich middle aged lady traveling together is a much safer alternative.

Back across the narrow sea, it appears Daenerys’ hands are pretty cut up from something (new rough life?), though she seems to be more interested in her dragon eggs.  She is getting her hands dressed and one of her  helpers tells her about how the moon was originally a dragon’s egg.  She asks to be alone with that particular girl, so naturally the servant then divulges that she used to be a prostitute.  Daenerys asks her to teach her how to please her man, and the servant agrees.

About that lesbian thing...

However, it appears to work.  After some reluctance from Drogo, he agrees to try a new position where she is on top.  Yay.  They both appear to enjoy it much more.

Back in Winterfell, Sansa goes on a walk with Joffrey after horribly awful romantic mini speech where he calls her ‘his lady’.  They come across Arya and the Butcher’s boy play fighting with wooden swords.  Joffrey then proceeds to intimidate the boy and try to make him fight Joffrey with a wooden sword, while Joffrey, you know… has a real sword.

He starts cutting into his cheek, and Arya loses it and hits him in the back with her wooden stick.  The boy takes off.  Joffrey then starts swinging his sword AT ARYA, and then Sansa starts yelling AT ARYA to stop.  Wait, what?  Joffrey then gets her on the ground, but Nymeria comes to Arya’s rescue and starts ripping the shit out of his hand.  Arya then picks up Joffrey’s sword and then appears to toy with the idea of just killing him, before deciding against it and tossing his sword into the river.  Smart move!  Though I wish she would have killed him.

FUCKING DO IT.

Arya runs off and throws stones at Nymeria to make her run off as well so the wolf doesn’t get caught and killed for ripping into the precious prince’s hand.

Ned goes searching for his daughter, but it appears she was already brought back to Robert and his family.  Joffrey of course states that Arya and the butcher’s boy beat him up and then set loose Nymeria on him, to which Arya vehemently contradicts.  Cersei then calls for Sansa to come downstairs to give her account.  Sansa looks around nervously at everyone and then tries to take a neutral path by saying that she doesn’t remember anything.

Big mistake.

Robert seems fed up with the situation and states “Children fight, it’s over.”  Cersei however seems bent for ‘justice’ and demands that the wolf be killed.  Nymeria however is missing, so Cersei asks for Lady to be killed.  Robert looks unhappy about it, but agrees so he doesn’t have to look at her fucking face anymore (WHATS WRONG WITH YOUR FAAACEE?).  Don’t blame him.

Ned appear distraught by the decision, and decides that he should be the one to kill Lady, as she is a wolf of the North.  As he slits Lady’s throat, Bran wakes up.

Final thoughts:

  • Anyways, I was pretty much on the edge of my seat to find out what happened to Bran at the end of the last episode, although I was on the fence about his ‘death’.  I didn’t see why they would make the point to introduce a major character and then kill him off in the first episode.  I suppose for shock value… but it seemed a little farfetched.   I’m not surprised that he woke up at the end of the episode, though I imagine he will be crippled.
  • Although Cersei is at fault for Lady’s death by demanding it, I also put the blame on Joffrey for being a cunt, Robert for being a pussy, Ned for being a pussy, and Sansa for being a pussy.  I actually think it’s largely Sansa’s fault.  If she had told the truth, her companion would probably still be alive.
  • Benjen is hot.  So are the majority of the men on this show.  Sigh.
  • I love Tyrion.  Honestly, he has all the best lines… and the most fun parts.

Who do you fault for Lady’s death?

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